1) How old do you wish you were?
about 24 when I has a really tight bod from karate
2) Where were you when 9/11 happened?
at home...way too close to the action
3) What do you do when vending machines steal your money?
shake rattle & roll...oh yea and curse like a sailor.
4) Do you consider yourself kind?
a veritable saint I would say. but I have always been called a sinner.
5) If you had to get a tattoo, where would it be?
it would be prominently displayed on my neck, it would read "FU MOFO" <--- there is a story behind that.
6) If you could be fluent in any other language?
Spanish and Vietnamese so I could find out what
my neighbors and my manicurists are saying about
me in FRONT of my face. So rude. But I am so self
involved I am assuming that I am the topic of every
discussion. Yeah, they are talking about me.
7) Do you know your neighbors?
no and I don't want to. I might as well be a serial killer
because I definitely like to "keep to myself" I hate small talk and BBQ's. I end up saying something offensive because I have been on the internet so long nothing is taboo. I mean, really, my 68 year old neighbor wouldn't possibly comprehend goatse
8) What do you consider a vacation?
a refill.
9) Do you follow your horoscope?
not at all. Anyone who seriously believes in that crap has issues. But yes occasionally I read them but in my opinion "The Magic 8-Ball" is way more accurate.
10) Would you move for the person you loved?
ummm...move out of my chair or move out of the way sure but I hate packing so they will have to move along and find someone more flexible.
11) Are you touchy feely?
Oh Heavens No!
12) Do you believe that opposites attract?
I believe I can Fly, I believe I can touch the sky.
13) Dream job?
My dream would be not to have any jobs. But if I must choose I'd say a caretaker for an wealthy elderly gentleman (with no meddling kids) whose knocking on heavens door....oh yes and he must be able to hold a pen in his hand.
14) Favorite channel?
HGTV and VH1 and the gay channel Bravo
15) Favorite place to go on the wknds?
stay home...fuck driving with all those lunatics and gangbangers out there
16) Showers or Baths?
must a choose....I like my aromatic B.O. funk. rain showers
17) Do you paint your nails?
No that gossipy Vietnamese bitch that from no. 6 does them. She's talking about me and I tip this bitch...that's rich.
18) Do you trust people easily?
no rarely. I have read enough true crime books and watched enough Judge Judy etal. that I don't even trust myself.
19) What are your Phobias?
spiders, storms.heights and uncircumcized...things.
20.) Do you want kids?
no more..all though I may adopt some street kids for
the summer...someone needs to mow the lawn.
21) Do you keep a handwritten journal?
Yeah right that is all I need "Exhibit A-342 for the court labeled "The Journals" no thanks.
22) Where would you rather be right now?
incoherent
23) What makes you feel warm and fuzzy?
sappy commercials. Get me everytime.
24) Heavy or light sleeper?
light
25) Are you paranoid?
Is Al Gore a boring blowhard?
26) Are you impatient?
ALWAYS
28) How do you feel about interracial couples?
this is 2007 who cares? (err I mean 2006)
29) Have you been burned by love?
Yes. but my nickname was the "Human Flame Thrower"
so I may mave been singed but there are a few guys
who have voodoo dolls in my likeness. P*ssys
30) What's your favorite pick up line?
no pick up line just a simple statement (to a coworker bringing in his wife or girl in for the first time) that's funny: "Wow, you got a new girlfriend...I didn't like the girl you had in here yesterday she was A BITCH"
31) What's your main ring tone on your mobile?
Clint Eastwood by the Gorrilaz
32) What were you doing at midnight last night?
lets see...I was scared....there was an awful storm.
33) What did the last text on your cell phone say?
confirmation plans for dinner in Springfield on Monday.
34) Whose bed did you sleep in last night?
funny you should ask...I fell asleep in the tub and then my husband then woke me up from a perfectly comfy sleep to drag me in bed, atleast I think it was my hubby....and my tub....and my house.
35) What color shirt are you wearing?
generic cotton tee.
36) Most recent movie you watched?
Sid and Nancy. Can't get enough of that
37) Name three things you have on you at all times?
ipod, palm pilot, cell phone (nerd nerd nerd)
38.) What color are your bed sheets?
floral pattern
39) How much cash do you have on you right now?
about 70 and change
40) What is your favorite part of the chicken?
entrails....and for personal reasons I'd rather not go into right now.
41) What's your favorite town/city?
L'Enfant Plaza in DC ...great shops and snobby gays,
you gotta love it.
42) I can't wait till:
this fucking quiz is over, what is this "War and Peace"?
43) Who got you to join MySpace?
I joined because all the cool kids were doing it. No, I had other motives...spying on friends and family.
44) What did you have for dinner last night
Queen Victoria Filet, sweet potato and coconut shrimp
for my birthday dinner at the Outback steakhouse and the lame employees sang me happy birthday...even though I requested this I pretended that I was slightly embarassed.
45) How tall are you barefoot?
5 foot whatever you stalker! How big is your schlong? huh? huh? no answer? I thought so. tables turned. score one for Nat
46) Have you ever smoked heroin?
No. I'd like to keep my teeth and possessions
47) Do you own a gun?
Yes a purty black .44 special
48) What do you prefer to drink in the morning?
water or agua
49) What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex?
my cunning wit and ability to make them think they can't get anyone better. and a little GHB in the drink helps.
50) Do you have A.D.D.?
probably I am planning on looking up the symptons more carefully so I can complain to my doctor that I have it so I can get that Lindsay Lohan med Adderal
51) What time did you wake up today?
about 8am
52) Current worry?
getting the convertible inspected, those goddamn grifter mechanics see a lady and think it's payday.
53) Current hate?
where to start? illegal aliens taking the jobs I don't want. Hollywood liberals, lawn chairs, traffic, snobby foreigners, working, car payments, unresponsible teens. ect ect ect
54) Favorite place to be?
In the backyard reading the tabs
55) Where would you like to travel?
Within the USA, fuck those foreigners they all hate us so why bother wasting the money on airfare. I could easily recreate the experience at McDonalds by having a mexican spit on my burger than dropping a few
grand to go to Paris and have them piss in my soup.
56) What do you think you'll be in 10 yrs?
hopefully out of Virginia...I swear I think it takes a Government pardon to be released.
57) Last thing you ate?
a 4 dollar hotdog from Wolftrap. (not woth it.....at all)
58) What songs do you sing in the shower?
Sister Sledge, Stones. Rob base, Slick Rick, Bowie. Sinatra, Sir Mix Alot whateva
59) Last thing that made you laugh?
an awful singer in Lord of the Dance. Her voice was so HIGH it made small babies in the audience cry. seriously.
60) Worst injury you've ever had?
unexplained seizure probably from Vioxx....I need to jump on that legal banwagon I have neurology reports to prove it....did Cochran die? He seemed like a bitchin' lawyer all crooked and preacher-like.
61) Does someone have a crush on you?
I can only imagine the amount of myspacers who are mesmerized by the hue of my blue skin.
62) What's your favorite candy?
skittles, but the rainbow taste like shit
63) What song do you want played at your funeral?
the last song on my playlist "I did it My Way" By Frank Sinatra although I wish he made a song " I did it mostly my way" anyway, that's the song and it's in my living will so if they don't play it I will haunt them.
word.
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